After being there for only two days, I don't think I'm in a place to give a thorough review of Cambodia's capital. I can, however, relay my experiences and perceptions of the city as I saw it in what little time I spent there. Phnom Penh was very different from Siem Reap. Generalizing, it felt much seedier, but worth the trek. Begging children and families were everywhere. The kids selling their souvenirs were far more aggressive and seemed hardened. Creepy looking older western men were ubiquitous, as were the prostitutes hanging off of them. I felt the least comfortable here than anywhere I'd been throughout the summer. It may have something to do with the fact that we were down to only two of us from our original group of seven in the beginning. We arrived at night and roamed the streets hunting for a suitable hostel. After two hours and a lot of frustration, Lindsay and I agreed on a place. It was tiny and dingy, but not as scary as some of the hostels we had walked away from. We were both getting pretty grumpy, but it was fine once we had settled in.
On our only full day in the city, we began at S21 or Tuol Sleng Genocide Museum. It was originally a high school, but was converted into a prison during the Khmer Rouge regime from 1975-1979 where thousands of innocent civilians were detained and tortured. Being there was an experience like nothing else. I was shaken to my core and felt physically ill. I could feel an energy walking through the rooms. It was as if the pain of the atrocities that took place had been absorbed into the building itself. I could just feel it. It was bizarre and scary and overwhelming.
After S21, we went to the Killing Fields, a mass grave where the victims of torture were brought after being at S21. Thousands and thousands of bodies are buried there. You can still see bits of bones and clothing coming through the dirt. That stories that I read and heard that day were unbelievably horrific and I still can't begin to fathom how or why something like this happened. Lindsay and I talked a lot about our experience in the following days. I don't think I've ever been so affected by something in my life.
Later that evening while out, we met some other people who had been to the killing fields that day as well. We talked about it some more and our conversation eventually turned to the state of Cambodia today. The poverty, the prostitution, the people's way of life in general... and the people who go there to exploit the women. The layers of issues in that alone are beyond my comprehension. If anything, I realized how ignorant I am to the world I live in. I have definitely grown up in a bubble. But I'd never been more thankful and grateful for the life I have been granted. The childhood I experienced is worlds apart from that of most Cambodian children. Sex tourism is prevalent. What is technically illegal, seems to be readily accessible and acceptable. And this is only what is on the surface. The thought of what exists in the underbelly makes me shudder.